The Trade
by TheEliteLabRatsLover
Summary: Wally gets trapped in the speedforce, and eventually begins to believe that he'll never be able to go home. But Barry's not about to let that happen.


**So...this idea popped into my mind after last weeks episode and I just HAD to write it out before the ext one...so, yeah. That's what this is. ;) A good song to listen to would be "Rise" by Katy Perry. Eh, just kinda' been obsessed with that song lately...lol. I really hope that you enjoy this, and f you do, please let me know! ;)**

 **P.S. Don't forget that I'm now accepting prompts! ;)**

 **Disclaimer: I own no part of this..do you seriously have to even ask..?**

* * *

Wally isn't even sure of what happened.

He struggles to remember what he had done before waking up on the couch in his home.

What _had_ he been doing?

His head throbbed constantly, as a reminder that whatever the heck he had done, he wouldn't be doing it again.

He sits up, clutching gingerly at his head, and wincing as he felt a small, burning ache in his muscles. Had he exercised?

Whatever he had done, it had been hell on his muscles. He frowns, struggling to remember what he _had_ done, because this was _not normal_ , and stands up. He walks into the kitchen, before speeding around the house a couple of times. He frowns again.

 _That's weird_ , he thinks.

There's nobody home.

He steps outside, and frowns again; _there's nobody on the streets_. That never happens. Something was going on...and he was determined to find out what it was. Maybe even a little bit afraid to know what it was.

He starts jogging down the sidewalk; at a normal pace, when it suddenly hits Wally. Everybody's probably at Star Labs.

 _Duh_.

He thinks, and shakes his head once, before using his super speed and Flashing to the main cortex. _It's empty, too,_ he muses. Where the _hell_ is everybody? He hears a quiet tapping sound, and immediately spins around to see Iris walking up to him. A relieved sigh escapes past his lips as he immediately walks to her side and gently grabs her arm.

"Iris, thank goodness. Where is everybody? There's nobody at home, and I haven't seen anybody here, and-" He stops abruptly when he notices the rather blank look on her face, not confused, just... _blank_. "Iris?" He questions, and she smiles slightly.

"Yeah?" She says and he frowns, because _this_ _is not Iris_.

"What's going on? You're...you're not Iris." He declares, taking a step back, and she nods with a small smile.

"Very good. Usually it takes longer for one to figure it out." She says, and he takes another step back, already in a defensive stance.

"Who are you? And what have you done with my friends?" He says, and his voice is firm; guarded. She simply smiles and takes a step forward with her hand out to touch his shoulder, but he takes another step back and away, watching her hand nervously while also trying to calm his racing heart. She stops with a knowing sigh and smile, before putting her hand down.

"That's a little complicated, Wally. Here, have a seat and I'll-" She's saying, but his head is spinning and his heart is pounding because his friends are gone and _this isn't Iris_.

"Where are they!?" Wally demands, and she sighs, knowingly, _again_ , and looks at him. And he's startled by the amount of calmness there is in her eyes.

"Trust me, Wally, they're safe. I may not be Iris, but I am certainly not the enemy here."

"Then who are you?" He asks, and his voice is almost pleading, because _what is going on_? She smiles with a gesture.

"Why don't you take a seat? Because this might take a while to explain..."

...

Wally grips his head in his hands as he shakes it; standing in disbelief. "You're lying!" He exclaims to the _speedforce_ , at least, that's what they _claim_. ""You're lying!" He repeats, as if somehow it'll make it true. "You have to be." He says, voice quieter.

"You...you _have_ to be. I can't be in the speedforce..." Wally's saying, disbelief filling his words, even though a part of him believes it to be true. Suddenly, a thought dawns on him and his eyes widen. "My friends...I have to go back. They need me!" He says, and 'Iris' must be able to sense what he's about to do, so she immediately stands up and grabs his arm.

"You are staying right here, Wally. There's a reason you're here, and you don't just get to leave and come whenever you want." She declares, a hard tone to her voice, and he nearly wants to sob, because _how could this be happening_?

"So I'm just stuck here?" He asks, and he's sure that his tone is wavering and his eyes are watering, but he just can't _focus_. 'Iris' sighs with a sad, yet still firm, official, smile and gently places a hand on his shoulder, and he doesn't know why, but it somehow calms him.

"Time will only tell." She declares, and he wants to know what that statement means, wants to ask, but his mouth is frozen, and suddenly within a blink of the eye she's gone and he's left alone in the cortex, struggling to grasp onto the reality of the situation.

" _Time will only tell_..." He repeats in a whisper, and his throat is closing, because what the _hell_ does that _mean_? What happens now? Where does he go? What does he _do_? He's startled out of his thoughts when he hears an all too familiar voice calling to him.

"Wally?" A quiet voice asks, and he's barely able to be turn around when he sees _her_. Part of him wants to jump for joy, and part of him wants to sob, but instead he takes a step back, slowly shaking his head as tears form in his eyes.

"You're not real..." He says, and it's like a mantra in his head, followed by _don't trust anyone or anything_. 'Jesse' sighs as she stops herself from taking another step forward, towards him.

"I'm not. You're right. But I'm here for you, to help you. Because you _will_ need me." She says, and he's not sure whether or not to be reassured or to be afraid of what that statement means, but he still follows her when she asks him to, because this is _Jesse_. Even though it's not.

And if there's anybody he can trust; it's her.

But if it's not technically her...his head spins and it _hurts_ because what _is going on_? But he still follows, and he's not sure if it's voluntarily or not, but he does.

Because he knows that wherever she takes him, whether it's the real her or not, he will always follow.

...

He's forgetting.

He knows it, but he just _can't stop it_. He's been here for what seems like an eternity, but he knows that it hasn't even been that long. There are times when he can't even remember what his old life was like, or what even his name is.

There are times when Wally sees Jesse, and he can't even remember his _own_ Jesse.

Sometimes he just plain forgets that he's in the speedforce. It's getting harder and harder to differentiate reality from fiction, and only then does he realize that this _is_ reality. Just a different type.

He's visited his mom in the hospital.

But he has to continually remind himself that she's _gone_ , she's _dead_. _This isn't real_ , but he's struggling to remember that it isn't. He spends his day wandering and running, _trying_ to remember his old life, but failing each time.

It's like a prison.

He's destined to stay here for all of eternity, never to see his friends and family again, and eventually just forgetting that they exist, all together. He doesn't know what he did to be here, or what happened to him, he doesn't even remember who he even _is_ some days.

 _Wally_ , he reminds himself, _I am Wally West, son of...of..._ he struggles to remember, and is getting worse as the seconds tick by. _James? Son of James West? No...that's not it. But if it isn't...then what is_?

He doesn't know, and every minute he feels a part of himself just slipping away into a blank abyss, swallowing his former self, and he feels like he's _losing his mind_. He's wandering, and wondering; _who am I_?

But he's afraid that he'll never know. Perhaps that former self doesn't exist anymore. Perhaps, even, _this_ is his new self. This is who he is. He prays not, but Wally fears that it's slowly becoming the truth, day by day.

He's wandering one day, when suddenly Jesse shows up, and he smiles, even though it's strained, and it only falters even more when he sees the serious look on her face.

" _Come_ ," She demands, and he obeys, following her as she weaves her way back to Star Labs. She hesitates at the doorway, glancing back at him for a moment, and he sees the blank, detached look in her eyes as she looks at him, and it almost breaks him that it isn't his Jesse, even though it seems as if she is.

She doesn't care about him, and he swallows past the lump in his throat as she opens the door and he walks in, following her, because _he will follow Jesse until the ends of the Earth_.

She leads the way into the main cortex, and his eyes settle on the lone figure, leaning against the side of the wall, and he feels a nagging in the back of his brain as he struggles to remember who this stranger is, because _he knows him_.

The stranger's eyes look up, and a relieved smile spreads across his lips and Wally is _struggling_ , because there's something so familiar about this guy, yet he doesn't know who he is.

" _Wally_..." The stranger breathes. "You're okay." He says, and Wally's not sure on whether or not he's saying it for Wally or for his own reassurance.

"Who...who are you?" Wally asks quietly, and it's breaking Wally inside that he can't remember who this is.

"I'm Barry," He says, and there's no shock in Barry's eyes, only misery.

"I'm sorry...I-I can't remember." He says slowly, and Barry's jaw tenses as he nods his head in understanding.

"What are you doing here?" 'Jesse' asks Barry, and her tone is sharp, but not harsh. It's direct, it wants answers. Barry straightens as he looks at her, and Wally notices how he's favoring his side with his left arm and how he stands with his weight on his left leg.

"I want to take him back." Barry declares, and Jesse sighs.

"That's not possible." Jesse states.

"Why not?" Barry asks, and his voice is tired, but firm, and Wally is struggling, _again_ , becausehe _knows this guy_.

"He needs to earn it. Savitar is out there now because of him," She says, and Wally frowns; _who's Savitar_? Barry sighs.

"That wasn't _his fault_." Barry grounds out, his hands clenching and unclenching. "I'm not leaving without him." He declares and there's this _look_ on Barry's face, and suddenly Wally is remembering, and everything is coming back, and it's all suddenly too much for him to handle.

 _Savitar, Wally running for his life, portal, Barry, Iris, Joe, Star Labs, speedforce, Jesse,_ his _Jesse_.

Wally's hands come up to his face because he finally _remembers_ , after all of this time, he finally remembers his _home_.

He doesn't even know what they are saying, but the word _trade_ catches his attention, and his head jerks up as he sees Barry looking at Jesse, a certain level of unmatchable determination evident in his eyes, and Jesse looks back, her gaze steely cool.

"Your life for his. You stay here and he goes. That's the only way we'll let him go. Take it or leave it." She declares, and Barry's jaw tenses as his fingers run over each other, and Wally is looking at him, because he _remembers_ , and Barry, _don't, don't do this_.

Wally is torn as Barry looks at him, because Wally wants to go home, has practically been begging this entire time to go home, but this is _Barry_.

Wally can't let Barry sacrifice himself for _him_. He wants to protest, _needs_ to protest, but he can't seem to find his voice as Barry looks at him with a tight smile. He looks back at Jesse and nods.

"I'll take it." He suddenly declares, and Jesse nods back, grabbing onto Wally's arm, and he tries to protest, but her grip, _it's_ grip is strong and unrelenting as it takes him away. Wally glances back and sees Barry for one last time, before his world turns into a bright, white swirl, and he's enveloped in it, before he's suddenly stumbling out of a portal, returning to the real world.

He's in Star Labs when he stops and straightens himself, and he looks up to see Cisco, H.R., Julian, Caitlin, Iris, Joe, and _Jesse_. _His_ Jesse. Everything is deathly silent, before suddenly Jesse is running towards him and embracing him in the tightest hug he's ever had, but it doesn't matter because he's _home_.

His heart is breaking, because he's finally back to the place he's been dreaming about for who knows how long, but Barry _isn't_.

Joe and Iris are next, and he hears Cisco, Caitlin, Julian and H.R. in the background, happy and cheering, because Wally is finally _back_. Jesse is crying tears of joy as she holds onto him, mumbling incoherent words of relief and how she thought he'd never return, and Wally has tears in his eyes, too, but not for the reason everybody thinks.

Iris seems to be the first one to realize what, or _who_ is missing, and she stops instantly on her way over.

"Wait...Wally?" She asks, and her voice is quiet, fearful, and his jaw clenches as he looks down, and her hand comes up to her mouth in horror. "No..." She says, and everyone looks at her, suddenly realizing that somebody is _not here_.

Wally can't find it in him to speak, because he _caused this_. His throat is dry, and at the same time there's a lump in it as Iris slowly backs away and runs out of the room. She couldn't let him see her cry.

She was beyond joyous that he was back, he knows this, but he doesn't know that the last thing she did to Barry was break off their engagement. Joe is standing there in shock, and Wally feels immense guilt radiating off of him, because he _should have stopped it_.

But he didn't.

He had the chance, but he still didn't.

Deep down, he knows that nothing could have changed Barry's mind. But that doesn't stop him from biting his lip to hold back his tears at the looks on everybody's faces. Joe is still standing there, unsure on whether or not to hug Wally, comfort Iris, or mourn the loss of his son.

He had gotten Wally, his son, back...but he had lost another son in the process.

 _A better son_ , Wally believes. A son that had sacrificed his own life for Wally's. Joe decides to do all three; he hugs Wally first with a watery smile as he places a hand on the side/back of his head.

"Good to have ya' back, son." He says, and Wally tries to smile, but it's strained, and Joe returns it just as much, before leaving to go comfort Iris. Cisco is hanging in the back, still reeling in shock, as Caitlin stands there, pain filling her eyes even though she tries her best to hide it.

"Excuse me," She says in a quiet, vulnerable voice, before all but running out of the room. Julian, excuses himself as well, before tracing her footsteps out of the room, so that he can comfort her, also. Jesse, he realizes, must be oblivious to the outside world, as she only holds onto him like there's no tomorrow.

But he's grateful for her to just be _there_.

She's like an anchor for him, so that he doesn't get whisked away in the violent storm winds. H.R. is silent for a moment, before walking up to him with his usual bright smile and patting his shoulder.

"Like the good man that is Joe, said; good to have ya' back, Wally!" He exclaimed, and Wally couldn't help but chuckle at the older man's attempt to cheer him up.

"Thanks, H.R." He says, and his voice did not crack. It _didn't_. H.R. leaves, and when Wally looks up Cisco gives him a smile that says the same- _good to have you back_. Wally nods slowly, and Cisco leaves the room before Wally can see the tears forming in his eyes.

Jesse continues to hold him, oblivious to all of the pain going on all around her, and Wally knows that he should tell her, _needs_ to tell her, but a part of him refuses to move. Not wanting to ruin the tranquility that fills him when he holds her in his arms.

But he does it anyway, because it's the right thing to do, and he needs to make up for _not_ doing the right thing today, because that was _Barry_. _Barry_ did the right thing. So he gently pushes Jesse away only a little bit, so that her hands are on his side, and he cups her cheeks, and she's smiling but his heart is breaking.

"Jesse," He says, but she just smiles and kisses him for a moment, pulling away with an even bigger smile, and he hates how her smile falls when she sees his face, but she _needs to know_.

"Wally?" She questions, and her voice is weak and he's struggling because this is actually _his_ Jesse, yet he can't help but think there the same person. The same, uncaring person, even though he knows that she's _not_ , and never _could be_.

"Jesse..." He says, and his voice is breaking and she's frowning and shaking her head in confusion, because she had _just gotten him back_. She couldn't lose him again. "Barry, he's..." His voice trails off because he can't find it in him to speak what happened out loud.

He doesn't even know if Barry is even alive anymore. Realization seems to sink into her eyes as she quickly glances around the room, and her lips part slightly as it dawns on her.

She looks back at him, and he shakes his head. "A trade." He says simply, and her eyes widen as she realizes what he means, and suddenly she's engulfed him in an even bigger, tighter hug as she's telling him what he needs to hear, but doesn't believe.

After ten minutes consisting of him crying silently, and her offering words of comfort even though she's dealing with the pain herself, yet simultaneously feeling relief because _Wally is all right_ , she asks him to tell her _everything_.

And he does.

He tells her everything that he remembers; waking up in an empty house, 'Iris', his mom, even 'Jesse', and he's unbelievably relieved that she isn't mad, and that she understands. _She'd do the same thing_ , she says. He feels better, but still can't help but feel as if he had cheated on her.

They sit on the steps of the cortex while he tells her _everything_. He doesn't understand how he could possibly feel so at peace, yet so miserable, at the same time. All he knows, is that through it all, Jesse is by his side. And he realizes with a tight, and exhausted smile, that she will always be.

As will he be with her.

...

They find there way into the training room where everybody seems to be. Jesse has her arm around Wally, supporting him even though he's not even really physically tired, but he's still emotionally exhausted.

Everyone still has tears in their eyes, but their eyes do light up when they see him, but all he can think about is how _it should be Barry here_.

Not Wally that they're all relieved to see.

Iris immediately comes up to him, and looks at him for a moment, but right when he's about to apologize, she suddenly embraces him in a hug that almost rivals the intensity of Jesse's.

"I am _so_ sorry for how I acted." She says with a sniffle, and he closes his eyes with a shake of his head as she pulls away.

"No, you had every reason to react like that. _I_ am so sorry, Iris." Wally states, and he knows that it doesn't help- _how could it possibly help?_ -but she still nods and offers him a strained, closed smile. Joe's next, and he engulfs him in a huge bear hug, but Wally can't stop the recurring thought in his mind; _I don't deserve this, I'm the reason Barry is gone_.

"I am so unbelievably happy that you're back, son." He's saying, but Wally feels his chest tighten in bittersweet agony.

"I'm-" His voices hitches. "Happy to be back, dad." He says with a watery smiles and Joe nods as he backs away with another strained smile. Everybody else offers him smiles as he looks at them each, individually, before sighing; knowing what's all on their minds.

"We'll get him back," He declares, and everybody nods slowly, and he can't help but not even believe his own words. _How_? His brain questions, but he pushes that thought away and says it again.

"We'll get him." It's a weak promise, but one that he's determined to follow through with. His brother had done everything that he could to get Wally back, and it was the least that he could do to return it. He can already feel his speed start pumping in anticipation at the new challenge.

Because _nothing_ could stop Wally from bringing Barry back. Though nobody seemed to notice, gold lightning flashed in his eyes as his speed settled on one goal only.

He had only one thought, _one promise_ , on his mind.

And it was one Wally would follow through with even if it killed him.

 _I'm coming for you, Barry._

* * *

 **Ta-da! Just my weird take on the speedforce and what I would love to see happen, even though I need my BARRY!**

 **...**

 **Was that as creep/stalker-ish as it sounded? Eh, whatever. ;P**


End file.
